(I wrote this one right after our last session and meant to rewrite it/ edit it. Never got around to it, so I figure I’ll post it here in it’s original form since I don’t know what else I want to do with it.)
Carson slipped into the well furnished room that Senator Organna had set him and his allies up in. His mind had been spinning lately, wondering whether any action he took was the correct one. He turned to Tor for solace. The young Camaasi’s comments were always insightful, and if the embattled doctor needed one thing, it was sanctuary from the emotions and feelings that swam through his head daily. He found Tor standing on the balcony, looking out into the skyline. A vibrant mix of blue and orange hues greeted the pair.
“Tor, I was wondering if you had a moment to talk.”
“For you, my friend, I always have time.” Tor responded pleasantly.
Carson breathed out a sigh as he leaned against the ancient stone railing.
“You recall Aurra Sing, the bounty hunter?”
“Yes, I believe I recall you saying that you encountered her again in your travels.” Tor added.
“Well, yes. Cad Baine, he had Barris’ family and we were trying to rescue them. Aurra had ambushed us from behind. I swore a path of non-violence, and yet, when she took aim at Barris’ and our allies, I let loose with the very same poison she had tried to kill us with.”
“As I’m sure you recall, it’s quite virile. Instantly begins to eat away the tissue, almost like an acid. Within a minute, any limb it is set into will be completely dead with no hope of repair. I watched her body instantly succumb to this poison. The look on her face…” Carson trailed off, overrun by memory. He composed himself again. “I swore an oath to not harm anyone again… and yet I had no problem pulling the trigger that day. We let her go because we felt there was a chance of redemption, and still she was there ready to destroy us in cold-blood.”
“You want to know if the decision you made was the correct one?” Tor interrupted, his eyes closed, hands folded in thought, his mind brought into a razor sharp focus on the moment.
Carson nodded. “Yeah…”
“We have to live with our actions regardless of whether they are right or wrong. You’ve seen me tread some dark paths, but those actions are a part of me, just as yours are part of you. They shape our character and, in the end,make us who we are.” Tor added, resting hand reassuringly on Carson’s shoulder.
“You are a good man, Carson. We’ve all come far since we began this journey together. Each of us is coming into our own. I think you’re finding who you are. The force guides all of us in anything we do. The light side and the dark side can both pull us in directions, sometimes directions we never anticipated going.”
“That’s the thing,” Carson added “I don’t know where the light side begins and where the dark side ends anymore. It’s clouded, shrouded and hazy, as if I’m stumbling through the dark and hoping to find the right path.”
“We must listen to our hearts, feel the force flowing through us. If we give ourselves to the flow of the force, the light side will guide us. It ebbs and flows through everyone. Even in Aurra Sing. There is good in all people, Carson. I know you see that. The force will guide you if you let it.”
Carson smiled, looking out over the skyline with the jedi.
“When we were on Coruscant, we were abducted by a detective by the name of “Holmes” I believe. Well, he and his men actually saved our lives, although they were more interested in the bounty on our heads than our well-being. We had to fight our way out…"
Carson paused, replaying the events. “We were able to capture him, eventually. And I overheard some of the others discussing torture, to try and glean some information from him.” Carson shook his head as he continued. “I- I couldn’t let that happen. Not anymore. So, when no one was around, I took off the binder cuffs and released him into the night. I fear my stance on the matter is ruining my relationship with our friends…”
Tor continued to stand, gazing into the distance. “Don’t worry, Carson. They are… good people. We’ve all suffered at the hands of the empire. We’re all concerned for our safety. Trust yourself to make good decisions and the others will follow. Have no fear and let the Force guide you. You are a man of principles, Carson. Have faith in yourself, and in the will of the Force.” Tor said, watching the sunset on yet another planet, the temparate wind not different from the last planet, or the planet before that.
“We are doing the right thing. Never lose sight of that and never lose sight of your values.”
Tor smiled. The Jedi was right. He needed to act, and not acting at all would cause more harm than good in many situations. If he didn’t act medically to help a patient, they would certainly die. To the best of his ability, he had to try.
“Thanks Tor. I truly appreciate your wise counsel.” Carson added as he turned to leave.
The sunset turned a deep purple, with a fiery orange cresting the horizon as it slowly sank.
Carson couldn’t help but see a parallel between the sunset and he and his allies. Sometimes they sank into dark places, but while drifting through shadows, they would still be a beacon in the darkness, and in the end, they would arise from it.
The dinner bell echoed throughout the palace as Senator Organna called the group down to share in their dinner.